I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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