I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
