I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
