She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
