if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
