the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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