Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
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