Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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