this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Randomize
