I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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