Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
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