Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
we're so committed to being not committed
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
