this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Randomize
