Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
