I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
