Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
