his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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