just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
When are your genitals available?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
