he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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