You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
