We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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