He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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