There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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