Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
