Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
