That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
