we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
he puts the penis in happiness.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I just gift wrapped bread.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
