grandma shit on top of the toilet
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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