I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
