I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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