Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
