Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

we dont do blackfin have a good night :)

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(651): View more from Minnesota

News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.

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(954): View more from Florida

I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.

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(810): View more from Michigan

You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults

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(302): View more from Delaware

Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio

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(407): View more from Florida

I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.

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(310): View more from California

Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea

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(416): View more from Toronto

Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night

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