Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.

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(719): View more from Colorado

Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night

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(240): View more from Maryland

YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.

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(513): View more from Ohio

Lets just say I chased with a burrito.

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(208): View more from Idaho

I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?

(1-208): View more from Idaho

Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important

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(419): View more from Ohio

dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me

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(513): View more from Ohio

I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him

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