Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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