Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I could fuck to npr.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
