My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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