The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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