At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
