glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
