8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
