everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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