Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.

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(847): View more from Illinois

How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?

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(817): View more from Texas

I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out

Fav 28 3443 916
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.

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(+64): View more from New Zealand

i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him

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(845): View more from New York

From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.

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(804): View more from Virginia

I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants

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(305): View more from Florida

I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door

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