Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
