At least make sure they are 18
Why
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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