I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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