we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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