I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
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