If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
