Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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