I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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